Maui Wowie

This was actually written on around Sept. 6th 2019, it updated it from my last-batch review of Maui.

Maui Wowie / 2nd grow

Genetics ——————————————————————

A hippie strain from back in the day sporting Hawaiian base genetics, it’s an unforgettable 80/20 sativa that’s supposed to induce a functional cerebral high that creates a mood lift and boosts creativity. Boosts energy and is a source of laughter. Helps with pain and nausea. It made me mildly hungry.

Effect——————————————————————–

Packed a big bowl in a big bong. Small hit – tastes sweet! Nice and not so much grassy as it is just sweet & weedy on the exhale.

Big hit – very easily held in the lungs, the most mild & disappearing throat tickle from the THC followed by an easy exhale. Effects come nearly immediately, within 20 seconds.

This stuff is a wake n bakers DELIGHT! It has a distortiony relaxing body and somewhat cerebrally distortioned [equating to a very happy feel]. The effects are very tuned to being happy, energetic, cerebral-focused, relaxing and I’ll mention thrice: happy! This is the strain that you’d want to use for clinical depression. This is the stuff that would slap the frown right off your face (along with White Fire OG & Gelato). Compared to the last batch it’s stronger, with the last batch I smoked a bowl and while it did the same thing effects-wise it felt like it were only 2/3rd’s of this cerebral. After a fairly large/medium bowl of this, didn’t even hold it long, it feels like a THC train to happyville and it comes with a good degree of cerebral, not body, stoneage. The visual is bright, things aren’t glowing/colourful but everything looks sharper while experiencing the mind-is-blinking effect where you look left & right but only pick up a small portion of what your eyes saw – the lowered frame rate effect, a big dose of that. Its happiness seems to cut through other BS feelings via its cerebral. I feel like I could’ve jumped into this in a really bad mood and this would’ve sent it home in a 180 real quick. The only bad thing with this – I can tell a beginner might feel they were just “too high”, it might zap their head and they’d just want to lay down for a bit and get the munchies. The cerebral gives you energy but the high itself doesn’t seem quickened pace, if anything it’s like a 10% quickened pace and not quite enough to be notable but it’s totally there. Definitely worth more than $160 for the amount of visually-seen high THC. I tell you, I’m functional but barely – and dare I say it – like a hippie would feel, relaxed and basically a major elation from thoughts that don’t make you feel good. The happiness seems to come from a distortion effect that separates the immediate “you” from… you, which will certainly bring out your humourous side. It keeps your thoughts above a certain level of comfortability. The amount of happy it gives – compared to how bad you may feel – might contrast into a super-weirdness until the effects fully take over (like being on an upper during a traumatic experience is weird feeling).

Looks/smell/touch—————————————————

Compared to the last batch that was $110 this is the AAA+++ version, they’ve certainly modified growing technique to where it’s grown to within about “91.5%” of its best potential – which means the fewest run-away leaves possible while everything else is top shelf. Accurate pictures, colours are amazing as a bright orange haired, lighter-green base with a hue all over that’s bluey. This stuff looks incredible, without having to break it open you can see the STOUT crystals that aren’t exactly caked but are so abundant and large, shiney and dusty (a notch below a caking, they’ve just spread out). The trich’s are incredibly impressive, huge dotted ends and they just shimmer back without ripping it open but inside it’s a crystal swamp.

When I opened the bag it had one of if not the outright strongest pungency I’ve had from this site and it was a head scratcher. It wasn’t skunky, tropical or pineappley in the least – it smells hardcore like grass and nothing else. I highly doubt it’s outdoor but that’s what it smells like, not a tropical thing, which I’m surprized at.

To the touch it’s perfectly curated and my fingers are sticky after crushing some. It busted out very nicely; not too velvety nor with a dryness with tiny pieces that are crackily – not that it really matters but the feel/look of it when ground is like a quad quality, just nicer than quad’s I’ve had, I suppose the positive here is it would roll easily without compacting so hard the joint becomes too tight.

It seems an AAA class because its smell isn’t a classical scent nor does it look absolutely perfect in its run-away leaves mid-bud that were trimmed very well/tight. The bud structure has some leveling out to do before it’s perfect but it’s damn near. Example, the crystals are very short in stature but also have huge dotted ends, the whole of is similar to something as good as Shishkaberry, telling me that the plant, during its switching stages between vegetating and flowering was confused for a minute, stopped flowering and starting vegging again before they again caught it and forced it to flower (by aggitating it). They caught it quickly enough that the bud structure is BOTH airey and dense. I think once the plant makes up its mind fully on what it’s doing for both processes it’ll be a quad. It seems like it flowered for a minute during veg and vice versa.

…. and yes, it may actually cause couch lock being an 80/20 sativa.